Poetry at Sangam

SangamHouse

 










by Shailza Rai

They searched me 
inside out
as if 
I were a pocket stitched to their pants
as if 
they could shove their hands
into my spirit
turn it inside out
empty the shell
 
 
they searched me 
for who I loved 
shoved a torchlight into my mouth
nails roughing up my pours
clawing in to see
if I were just a lump
 
 
I clenched my teeth in kindness
else I’d have bitten off their hands
 
 
They searched me 
inside out
as if 
I were a pocket stitched to their pants
as if 
they could shove their hands
into my spirit
turn it inside out
empty the shell
 
 
They searched me 
for what I ate
nose in my spice box

fingers in the cold cuts 
poison siphoning into my rice and meat curry
black sludge 
it spread on the floor
 
 
I cut oxygen to my brain for peace
else I’d have lunged at their throat
 
They searched me 
inside out
as if 
I were a pocket stitched to their pants
as if 
they could shove their hands
into my spirit
turn it inside out
empty the shell
 
 
They searched me 
for where I lay my head
and dreamt a private dream
invading my prayers 
with slur
snarling the radio into my head
numb
 
I shut my ears in love
else I’d have let out a scream so sharp
it would’ve brought down their roof
on their head