Poetry at Sangam
Poetry at Sangam showcases poetry in English and translations as well as essays on poetics and news of new releases.
dad today I shall talk to you
of cardinals
their pretty antics on my deck
their splash of brightness their skittishness
and when I tell you the birds are eating me
out of house and home
you tease me
but suddenly there’s a catch in your voice
and you say can we come live with you now
too late I say too late to migrate
how can I carry you over the seven seas now
and how can I bring our crows and sparrows
our coppersmiths and bulbuls our mynahs
kingfishers and racquet-tailed drongos
and the ghost of our African-grey
your favorite child from Zanzibar who died at 13
when he was supposed to live till a 100
how do I pack our world
sweet sour bitter
menacing safe
tarnished unspoiled
full of thorns and roses
crowded with people with birds
into one suitcase
and fly you here to see me
but you are birds now
free to roam
dad how you loved Judy Garland’s
Somewhere over the rainbow
and how in the hospital
how our voices always broke on bluebirds fly
why oh why can’t I
tears pooled in your sunken cheeks
the mask the tubes how could you speak or sing
your tongue a black stub in the back of your throat
but your eyes your hands locked with mine
hi dad I say hi dad when the cardinal visits
and hi sweet mum to the female
I choke up when they chip and chirr and nuzzle
and her wings quiver
she tilts to him as he feeds her
her beak slanted open
but later today he came without her so I panicked
and screamed at him where is mum where did she go
how could you let her she slip away
I shout at the empty deck
stay stay stay
dad remember the plastic birds I played with
the cardinal your engineer hands
pieced together so expertly and painted
what was it called the paint-by-number kit
you had bought on one of your voyages to the US
back in the day and you had a perfect set
a cardinal and goldfinch
a cedar waxwing and a pied woodpecker
you painted them and mounted them on the walls
of our Park Circus flat
and how the stories of your childhood
come back to me now
you ran wild in woods or scrubland
near Mumbai and Ahmedabad
the salt marshes of the Rann of Kutch
the great bird migrations
where
flamingos countless ducks
geese cranes storks flocked and covered
every inch of the brackish swamps
where hundreds of bustards could be slaughtered
just by aiming at the pupil of one of the eyes
of a single bird
now your blindness lifted
as you wander in and out
through my doors and windows
everyday we can talk of birds
I tell you the latest bird gossip
how the purple finches
bring their hungry brood
who shriek shrilly and feed endlessly
the feisty chickadees playing peek-a-boo
in my tomato plants and salvias
and lavender
the hummingbirds
battling in air
and the chestnut-bellied nuthatches
peeping and bobbing sweetly
as they pick just a seed at a time
and flip over the railing and away
and how the cardinals
feed then vanish
come back
and vanish and come back
and vanish again