}} LOVE IN THE TIME OF KHAIRLANJI by Pradnya Daya Pawar |

Poetry at Sangam

SangamHouse

 










LOVE IN THE TIME OF KHAIRLANJI by Pradnya Daya Pawar

Translated by Chayanika Shah and Shals Mahajan

Not a single leaf on the branch
This body, leafless, torrential
densely packed
susurrating

Rains of the past
lashed me,
straight – slanting
violent.
Those that were trying to ask – their
fingers
lips
marked
fiercely
lacerated

The moon was almost gone
by the time it reached me!
Weak
fading
dying

……………

Pash1 said:
“The most dangerous is
the dying of our dreams.”

Is this a lie, Bhima2,
that I speak your name?
In that moment
innumerable lotuses bloom
skin smooth as marble

Is this a lie
that I speak your name?
History comes alive
like menstruation.

In the global market
my grandmother sits, selling
scythe and sickle
bundles of grass
a chisel tongue
and language, a sharp weapon

How large is her hunger
and how long has she been thirsty
craving for a bhakri
I have never seen her.

She wanted to be human.

In
every war
every conflict
every riot
in the hidden anarchy of violence
in Khairlanji3
and
after Khairlanji

I keened, ululated
The whole house wailed
Objects wept tears
The sobbing would not stop
So those who were not objects thrust
their faces into walls

At that time too, I cried
A hundred years ago
a thousand years ago too
I was crying.
I’ve been crying all these years.
Why am I crying like this?

After all this crying, I still do not feel
free
What Aristotle proclaimed:
Catharsis!
I do not experience/
How many more tragedies do I have to witness?
I do not see a future
in which I can believe

I see Priyanka Bhotmange’s4
chopped, soft breasts,
the sticks they shoved in her private parts
them taking turns at raping mother and daughter
brutally brutally
husbands brothers fathers sons cousins nephews
and encouraging them by clapping
the mothers and sisters of Khairlanji!

This,
the loud beatings of drums of sisterhood
This,
This, utterly dismayed
somnambulant sixth floor of the Mantralaya5:
These are your daughters, Bhima
these tigresses, rising wild.

I feel ashamed
of those who say rape has no caste.

I feel pity
for those who forced brother to have intercourse with sister–
these perverse inheritors of Yama and Yami6.

Reality of caste
Reality of class
Reality of gender
The Potraj pulls
the painful whip of karma vipaka7
on his own body parts.

“Throw some money, watch the show!
Come on children, clap, clap,
clap some more.”

False bubble of global prosperity fly
in Bhaiyyalal Bhotmange’s8 eyes
that have turned to stone

Just as scabs of deprivation
were beginning to soften and fall
just as the age-old knots of darkness
had begun to unravel

Just as calm voices
were beginning to be
in tranquil times

It seemed
the past had shed
its tattered skin
and this ancient sob
we swallowed down our throats —
this cup of poison.

. . . still, it kept coming
the nightmare of disillusionment
again again again, countless times.
At any time of the day
At any time of the night
In every climate
In every season
the calendar keeps fluttering
backward — forward – forward – backward.

This country lost its original people
but this country was not lost to us –
you did not let us be so deprived

You gave us this vision, Bhima —
so we have not yet taken
a single grenade in our hands
You gave us this vision, Bhima–
so we kept alive through time
the predominance of karuna

We do not fly
doves of peace!
We do not have leisure
for we are fighting for our existence
Yet we kept shouting
in voices from our gut
live, let live, keep alive
absolutely without gain

And absolutely without gain, love too happened
in the midst of Khairlanji

This sparkling white cloud that is running free
he sat me on it
this beloved of mine, with eyes
completely naked
where, anyone can see
love
and Khairlanji

Go back to your husband,
to your husband!
Many voices rose
from lofty, secure rooftops

I refuse to become anyone’s object
I refuse to make an object of anyone

Can a woman laugh?
From her intellect, heart, and womb
loud, free and unpredictable!
Surekha Bhotmange9 should be asked this once
in public
in the middle of the town square.

How far is it still
the struggle for the annihilation of caste…

How far is he
the last man
standing in the queue

How far is she
the woman who is not yet in the queue

At this point
we have jumped into
the resistance with the same ineffective measures

“There is no difference between
living and dying, in love!”
In the inevitable struggle to change the world
when will the difference
between living and dying be erased, Bhima?

 
 

  1. 1. Pash: Pen name of a revolutionary poet of Punjab, Avatar Singh Sandhu (1950-1988)
  2. 2. Bhima: Dr. B. R. Ambedkar, jurist, economist, politician and social reformer who campaigned against social discrimination towards the untouchables.
  3. 3. Khairlanji: Village in Maharashtra, India that saw gruesome caste violence against Bhotmange family (2006).
  4. 4. Priyanka Bhotmange: Young girl of Bhotmange family who was raped and killed in the Khairlanji massacre.
  5. 5. Mantralaya: State secretariat in Mumbai, India.
  6. 6. Yama and Yami: Twin brother and sister in Indian mythology.
  7. 7. Karma Vipaka: A Hindu theological concept which says that good or bad that one gets in life, is a result of good or bad doings of the previous life. It justifies hierarchical caste system by maintaining that one is born in lower caste due to one’s own evil doings in previous life.
  8. 8. Bhaiyyalal Bhotmange: Priyanka’s father who was away at the time of the massacre and fought a legal case against upper caste criminals.
  9. 9. Surekha Bhotmange: Priyanka’s mother who was also raped and killed in the
    massacre.

 

PRADNYA DAYA PAWAR